Results Are In

When I had my biopsy on Wednesday, the surgeon asked me to come in on Monday to talk about the results. "How long does it take to get the results?" I asked.

"Forty-eight to seventy-two hours," he said.

"So you might know by Friday?"

"Yes."

I made an appointment for Monday, but asked him to call me with the news if he found out Friday, good or bad.

I did not expect the call to come at ten in the morning, while I was headed home from the gym, my hair still wet from the pool and smelling of chlorine. "I'm driving right now. I'm two minutes from home," I told him.

"Okay, I'll call you back in fifteen minutes. Okay?"

"Okay."

My thighs were shaking as I rushed into the house, used the bathroom, gathered a pen and paper and the phone, and sat down at the kitchen table to wait. I called J~ at work and told him to stay by the phone, I would call him right away.

When the phone rang, I had calmed myself. "I have your lab results," said Dr. S~, in a tone chipper enough to get my hopes up, "It's cancer."

J~ came straight home from work. We walked the dog, we cried, we looked up the terms. So far I am diagnosed with Ductal Carcinoma In Situ (which means cancer confined to the milk duct). But because the mass is so large - 2.2 cm - Dr. S expects this diagnosis will change to Invasive Ductal Carcinoma.

I am devastated. I am terrified. I am getting down to business. There is so much more to say but it will have to wait until I have a bit more free time to reflect.