Monday, October 24, 2011

Famished

Quick and easy: steamed kale, cannelini and black beans, dulse flakes, toasted walnut oil, salt, pepper, and a squeeze of fresh lemon.

Soup for breakfast: buckwheat soba (gluten-free!), red onion, carrot, spinach, pinto beans, ginger, dandelion-leek miso.

Now that cancer treatment is behind me, I feel like I'm famished - not for food (though I couldn't title a blog post this way and not show you some good food), but for life. There is so much I want to do, so much on my mind that eating and sleeping feel like chores, though I do both daily, in a sort of fever. By no schedule except the insistence of my stomach, I prepare the simplest, healthy foods I can throw together, clean my plate, then back at it. I put myself to bed only when my eyes are heavy with the need for oblivion, and I'm awake early, mind racing in the dark.

I am pigging out on LIFE, working, running with the dog, swimming with my mermaid buddies, dreaming and scheming and feeling excitement for each day like possibly never before, thanks to new found courage, focus, and clarity. To what do I credit this surge of zestfulness? Fear of death, of course!

I am scared that one of these days my scans (ultrasound in six months, and then another, plus mammogram, six months later) or blood tests (four weeks from now and every three months after) will derail me. My only defense is to LIVE like this moment MATTERS. Because it does.

4 comments:

Sonya said...

Such a great perspective on life you have. Bravo for living in the moment and getting the most out of every day!

I'll have to try a few recipes :-)

r3 said...

Can you tell this novice what dulse flakes taste like?

Amy said...

dulse is a dark red seaweed, I've heard it was used as a bar snack in Ireland long ago. In any case, it's salty, kind of oceany tasting, and its both chewy and melty in the mouth, I love it. The flakes are just tiny bitty bits of the big dried dulse leaves. It's a healthy substitute for salt, full of naturally occurring iodine and trace minerals. Get you some! :)

r3 said...

Thanks! I am so looking forward to your cookbook.