The biopsy last time left me very sore, with a baseball-sized bruise and a reluctance to move much. Every bounce of the chest stung, even the underwater bounce three days later, after my flip-turns when I pushed off the wall to begin the next lap.
This time, though there were three sites rather than one, surprisingly, it wasn't so bad. I was back in the pool last night, just a day and a half later, and I will probably go running today. Only my armpit is sore.
The new biopsies were done under the guidance of ultrasound. I was able to watch as the needle entered my flesh, as local anesthetic was squirted into and around the targeted areas, and as samples — little white strips about 1.5 cm long and the thickness of cooked spaghetti — were extracted, two or three from each site.
The three places that were biopsied included the original large lump in my right breast, another smaller lump found in the same breast (a new one), and the lump in my armpit (which turned out to be two enlarged lymph nodes side by side). I should here from Dr. Z today or tomorrow with lab results.
I expect to hear that the new lump is cancerous. It looked just like the larger one. If it is, there is no question - they will want to do a mastectomy. I don't know what to make of the lymph nodes, but I wouldn't be surprised by bad news there as well.
In any case, I have meetings scheduled with Dr. Z, the surgeon, and Dr. R, a medical oncologist, to discuss what happens next. Both appointments are on Friday. It will be good to get past this stage of anxious waiting.
In the meantime, I'm carrying my cell phone and voice recorder every where I go.
PS - if you were having surgery and wanted to have soothing, uplifting music in your ears while unconscious (something without much in the way of lyrics or drama) what would you choose? I'm looking for suggestions. Thanks!
9 comments:
I look for news from you in form of a new post every day and I've been thinking of you the last few days, knowing you'd had your biopsy.
Thinking of you and hoping those lab results come back quickly.
*hugs*
Oh and for the music.. clair de lune by debussy. Magnificent.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2XzoA94Zws
I've been thinking of you since I heard your news. My Grandmother is also a cancer survivor, now for well over ten years! She had a mastectomy, chemo, and radiation.
To answer your question, if I had to go under...I would probable listen to select tunes from the Wailin' Jennies....
One Voice - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bc6HloRYZGc
Parting Glass - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4egb2gpIg4&p=33967AE6620EF089&index=6&playnext=6 )
I haven't listened to Enya in years, but I would pull out "How Can I Keep From Singing?", "Watermark")...
For gentle peace, "Lux Aurumque" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7o7BrlbaDs&feature=channel
For healing, Sinead O'Connor's "Healing Room" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTrR_twYtfM
Sigur Ros "Glosoli" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HqcjgJCDuw
Those last two might be too intense?...
Sending you love, Amy.
Dagmar
I would listen to Karnamrita's album called Dasi: Prayers by Women. I first heard her in the National Cathedral. Peace and good luck to you.
sending you so much love and thoughts for good news. I'd be happy to make a couple of great mixes for you... have lots from my yoga classes: uplifting, not schmaltzy and just generally good.
let me know if I can help you in any way... even if it's just to have an ear to share this with... xo xo xo
I don't really have a suggestion for music, but I just found out I have to have surgery on my ovary soon, and I was thinking the same thing? Will they let me listen to my own music? Maybe I should make a mix. If you hear any good ideas, please post about them. I've be interested in hearing what you decide. Best of luck - thinking very benign thoughts in your direction.
Check out Zoe Keating, she is the most incredible cello player and her music is inspiring.
Here from LFCA to say I'm so sorry you're facing this, I can't imagine the emotions and feelings you're experiencing right now. Sending love, and hope for peace & strength when you need it most!
Vivaldi has some great guitar concertos and I like his 4 Seasons works too...Peace~Kerry
Amy, my thoughts are with you, especially after hearing the latest, as I'm sure is true for many folks who know you.
For music consider "Treasure" by Cocteau Twins or "Poem" by Delerium (both entire CDs). Maybe for the post-op period if not for the operation.
Jeff
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