Fallen

Okay, it's official. We're off the fence and in the mud. Trying again.

Reasons why we're trying again:

For another chance at the privelege and miracle of parenthood.

To do the genetic tango. (Maybe we won't ever be champions, but we still want to dance).

Because never having kids seems too darn sad.

Because after two consecutive miscarriages, our chances are still at least fifty-fifty.

Because we both imagine the pleasure will outweight the pain.

Because we discovered that after entertaining all our grave doubts and heart-stopping worries, inexplicably, we still want to.

Reasons why we aren't doing any fertility treatment or tests (yet):

Because the doc says they only help half the time anyway.

Because insurance won't cover it until I've had three miscarriages in a row or a full year without conceiving.

Because I'm afraid of that slippery slope, throwing energy and money and raw emotion down a potentially very deep and unrewarding hole.

Because it would take powerful persuasion to convince me to take any fertility-enhancing medications anyway. (I almost never take any kind of medicine. Neither does A~)

Because I haven't lost faith in my body (yet).