Sunday, August 11, 2013

Spoiler Alert

(From this spring. Uploaded the sequel to this one today. More of my videos here.)

I'm closing in on page three hundred of the first draft of what I hope one day will be the Babies or Not book. Once I'm finished—I figure I've got fifty or so more pages to write—I'll print the whole thing out and sit with it some place comfortable. In the warm sun I hope, maybe in a meadow or perhaps on a beach if I can finagle that, or else on the couch or sitting up in bed. In any case, I'll have a good red pen and some snacks and a notepad at my side.

I imagine I'll have some new writing to incorporate into the second draft, and a lot of older writing to strip away or wrangle into something more tightly honed. Eventually, I'll have a completed manuscript, the story of my journey through the reproductive years, which turned out very differently than I ever expected it would.

Early on in writing this, I began to imagine pitching the book to an agent or an editor, saying, "It's the story of an infertile abortion counselor's urgent but ambivalent desire to have children."

This imaginary conversation spawned a worry. What would I say if the editor or agent asks, "How does it end?" At first I drew a blank. So I asked myself, How does it end?

The answer came without a moment's hesitation. It's not exactly a fairy tale, but it's close enough for me:

"She gets cancer and lives happily ever after."

I hope the world wants this book, but if not, I'll be okay. I'll live my way into the next story.


loribeth said...

I for one would read your book. I'm a longtime reader, mostly lurker, who is also childless/free not by first choice and it bugs the heck out of me that the vast majority of infertility stories end with a baby -- sometimes in the most contrived ways. For some reason, happy ending seems to equal baby in most people's heads, and that's not always necessarily the case in "real life." Keep writing!

Amy said...

Thanks Loribeth! I feel like I'm in the middle of a marathon, getting a little tired but still plodding forward, and you just gave me a boost, cheering from the sidelines. Back to work! :)

KrisR said...

I'm with loribeth.....childless/free not by first choice but totally living the happily ever after and can't wait to read your book.

Down the road, if you need a proof reader/initial reader - let me know. My treat. :)

Amy said...

Thank you Kris! I need all the votes of confidence I can get. :)

Jamie said...

Good luck with your writing and I will be interested in where it takes you. There are times that I have looked through your old posts to read up on how you processed and moved through your experiences. You are further along in your journey than my own (in regards to IF and divorce), but it helps to know that some of the things that I think about are things that other people have wondered and worked through. It is not just in the immediate rebuilding, but also what comes your way when in a place down the road...when on your own or developing a new romantic relationship. Thanks! Looking forward to the book.